Wednesday, May 30, 2012

So Glad I Never Gave Up

I just received my cap and gown, and I am officially ready for graduation! It took me nine years to finish with my bachelors degree, but I did it! The decision to go back was easy for me, because when my heart is in something I just go for it. It was working full time, taking care of a little boy, and everything else life brought in my way that made it a bit crazy at times. There were nights I would be working in the office till 9pm trying to get a financial report finished, only to come home and have to open a book to complete homework.

I took two years off when my Dystonia was at its worse, and I couldn't type anymore. I remember being in tears with my mentor Frances, at my college, having to explain to her my reasons for having to drop out of one of my courses I had signed up for in the fall of 2008. She explained to me that there were tools I could get my hands on, which would allowed me to use my voice and have the computer do the typing for me. However, I remember being so depressed and in so much pain that going back to school wasn't even an option for me. I held back a lot of emotions with my family, and besides the obvious of my friends seeing the pain in my face, I never truly shared my fears and concerns as to where I was going to be physically with this Dystonia. Two years after my treatments with Botox, I surprised Frances in her office and signed up for another semester. She told me that she was going to see me graduate if it was the last thing she does in her life!

So here I am today, sitting in my room and looking at my cap and gown for the first time. I am overwhelmed with emotions, and I keep stopping my typing to wipe my eyes. God has a plan for me, for all of us. Sometimes the road to get there isn't as pleasant as we may want it to be, but what are you gonna do? He put so many tools in my life to help me get through all the rough patches, so I grabbed them and used them. Whether the tool was in a shape of a little boy to bring me joy and make me laugh when I needed to, or a new job to make more money and help me stay in my home for all those years, a mentor to cheer me on towards graduation when she knew how physically and mentally drained I was, or even a husband to show me that I don't always have to do things alone. If I had given up and stayed stagnant, without accepting and allowing all the beautiful things God has put into my life help me get to where I am, I wouldn't be about to graduate in a couple of weeks!!!!!

No matter how much pain or discomfort you may be in, use the help that family and friends offer you. Get the proper treatment you need to help ease your pain. Don't sit and watch everyone else live their life, and be one of those who wants everyone to feel sorry for them. We all have a story. Dystonia can be debilitating, but you can live an amazing life with it.

Okay, so let me go and see if this gown even fits me! Lol


Emily Poole said...

I really like your blog. You are, indeed a busy person but you never gave up. Everyone of us has a unique story in life and you serve as an inspiration for those who have trouble and discomfort in life. It's not bad to get out from our shelf and enjoy life once in a while. Life is beautiful. We must live with it wisely. :)

dleake said...

Thank you so much for your kind words.  This is exactly what my Blog is all about.  I don't just want to keep a diary, I want people to read it and hopefully be inspired...or inspire me to keep going, as you just did!  Thank you.